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Thursday, June 17th, 2010
 College, here I come!
Many of you regular readers will notice that you haven’t had anything new to read here in months! It’s confession time for me. I am dealing with my success! Yes, it’s true! I have achieved the latest element in my long term goal of going to college. It’s a goal that has been on my list for many years and now it has come to fruition.
Remember earlier this year, I told you that I was applying to go to college, now that my children are older and more independent? Well, I’ve been accepted into the college of my choice here in Dublin. I am thrilled. I am proud of myself. I’m even a bit gobsmacked that I’ve been accepted (old bad habits die hard!), but I have!
All my time since February has been college related. Not just on my own account, I should say, but this family is just at a college-phase of our existence. My daughter was busy submitting projects, studying for finals and then, in May, sitting her finals. My son was busy planning his college path and making his applications, based on how his exams go (they are ongoing - so fingers crossed) and I have been applying, doing aptitude tests, interviews and then waiting… and waiting … and waiting … until finally I got the letter that said “We are pleased to inform you …”
I’m struck daily by the difference in the way school leavers and mature students approach the idea of college. Firstly, when I was applying, I got a terrible fear of “What if I don’t get a place?” But my daughter, who’s been through it all, said simply “They you’ll apply again next year”. It had felt like a do-or-die issue to me, until she made me see that, while there is a lower age limit for mature students (23 in this case) - there is no upper age limit. I need have no fear that my time was running out!
I wrote a letter accepting the place. I asked my daughter if she thought I had given enough information. She smiled and told me that a school-leaver would have said - “Yes thanks, I’ll take the place” - whereas I said “Thank you for the offer of a place. If you need any more information please contact me at home (number) on my mobile (number) or at this e-mail (address).” And I signed off with “Looking forward to seeing you in September”.
Attitudes on exams also differ. My childrens’ exams give them the feeling that they are somehow being personally judged in their exams, whereas at this stage of my life I see them more as useful benchmarks of progress (or lack of) and I know that - win, lose or draw - life goes on after exams. I am not my work. It is just one expression of who I am.
A friend of mine told me: “Mature students always sit at the front of the class. They really appreciate being there. They want to see and hear everything that goes on.”
I agreed.
She said: “But, sitting at the front, you don’t see the people behind you. When you put your hand up to ask your very interesting question at 12.50pm, you don’t see the murderous looks of your classmates who were watching the minutes till lunchtime ticking slowly by!”
Apparently that’s one of the quickest ways to lose friends in college! So now I know.
I could keep on rambling on here about my college hopes, dreams and realities, but then this blog would never end. All I will say is that from Sept/Oct, I will no longer be actively pursuing my life coaching business.
This blog may continue. Or maybe someone will pay me to blog on the experiences of a mature student? Who know? My future awaits me!
Daria
Tags: achievement, Attitudes, Coaching, Fear, Goals
Posted in Career, Confidence, Life Coaching, Self Development, Self Esteem | 2 Comments »
Wednesday, November 18th, 2009
 Going the Extra Mile
I came across this video clip recently on YouTube, and I love it. I don’t know who made it or promotes it, but - as always here at LifePotential - I’m happy to pass on anything I feel will help us develop ourselves to the fullest. Our behaviour is often influenced by little things we see or hear. See what you think of this.
This is really about going the extra mile, doing that bit more, providing that extra special service. I read an article in the Irish Times last week about a woman who is opening an old fashioned Tea Shop in Co. Cork. Her research included a trip to afternoon tea at the Ritz in London. She said it cost her £42 per person, but that it was worth every penny of it. Now - do the Ritz serve better tea than anywhere else? I doubt it. Do they make better cakes/scones than a home-baker from Cork? Most unlikely. So why did she feel it was worth it?
She said that the welcome, the service (they had a waiter dedicated to their table), the crisp white linen cloths & napkins, the smiles, the “nothing-is-too-much-trouble” attitude made it worthwhile. She decided that that atmosphere was what she wanted to replicate in her tea shop. She bought proper china cups (from charity shops) rather than mugs. Her daughter decorates each cupcake individually by hand. She makes the tea in old fashioned china pots with knitted tea-cosy, on to keep it warm. All in all, she is bringing the care and attention to detail of her Ritz experience, to her own tea shop.
I found it a warming read, just to see someone going that extra mile to provide a luxury service to her customers. And she’s not getting 42 pounds a go for it. But I hope that she is getting loyal and happy customers. People know what they like: - they like to be welcomed, treated well, fed good food in good company and to leave with a smile on their face.
There are always areas in our daily lives where we have the chance to do a little bit extra for someone, to give a little more, to try a little harder, to be more pleasant in an exchange (smiling costs nothing as we’ve proven before!), to be more welcoming, to offer to help, to spend 5 minutes with someone who needs company. There are as many opportunities as there are moments in the day. Try some for yourself. Tweet me how you get on. You can start right now. If you’ve ever thought how someone you know would like to read these blogs or tweets, forward this to them right away. Job done. It might give someone a little lift.
Tags: Attitudes, Feelgood Tasks, Smiling
Posted in Beliefs & Values, Feelgood Tasks, Human Behaviour | 2 Comments »
Monday, August 17th, 2009
 Holidays … is that you get away from everything that is usual and “normal” in your life. It’s the most fantastic chance we have for self development. It gives us the opportunity to change our outlook on things in our lives.
I always find when I come from holidays (in fact even before I get home I find) I’m planning new things. I might think of a new layout for the furniture in my office or home. I might develop a new way to approach a certain client, or situation. I might decide to repaint the living room to get a whole new perspective on things. And that’s really what holidays do for me - in terms of my personal growth, they give me a change of perspective.
This year, when we came home from holidays, my husband said it had been like having “time off from the recession”. Because the recession is one thing - and it’s effects are very real. But the media “moan-fest” that goes on about it is entirely another thing. It’s like a big bandwagon all of its own. It’s a huge “ain’t it awful” circus that feeds itself on people’s misery. It’s a way of looking at it.
So time off from that was a real treat. And y’know what? The world still turned while we were away; the economists still wrung their hands; the unemployed were still unemployed; those in difficulty were still in difficulty - but the ones reporting it seemed to be having the time of their lives picking over the troubles of everyone else. That’s just their way of looking at it.
I’m very thankful that I had the opportunity to get away from it all for a few weeks. The situation didn’t change, but my view of it did. And that’s the point. When we look at some event in our lives that is causing us difficulty, it can be hard to separate the event from our reaction to it. What’s really happening is that a certain event takes place - then - we have a reaction to it. If we get to take a step back, a pause, a holiday - and choose a different reaction, then we have power over the outcome.
For example, if someone loses their job, that is a very real event. It has effects and consequences. But whether you deal with it as (i) a disaster from which you will never recover, or (ii) an unexpected event which may force you to look at things in a new way - is up to you. One will give you a miserable, self-defeating attitude, the other will give you a chance for personal development (albeit not looked for), to look at where your strengths lie and present yourself in a new way. Losing your job is the fact. How you deal with it is where your power lies.
It brings me back to the benefit of holidays. It gives us that break, that pause, in which to look at things in a new way. Happy holidays!
Tags: Attitudes, Change, Self Development
Posted in Creativity, Human Behaviour, Motivation, Self Development | 1 Comment »
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